Community Magazine September 2019

92 Community Magazine Riddle: Carnival Trick Submitted by Harry T. A boy was at a carnival and went to a booth where a man said to the boy, "If I write your exact weight on this piece of paper then you have to give me $50, but if I cannot, I will pay you $50." The boy looked around and saw no scale so he agrees, thinking no matter what the man writes he'll just say he weighs more or less. In the end the boy ended up paying the man $50. How did the man win the bet? Last Month’s Riddle: The Stair Master A family lives in a large tower apartment building, 12 floors high. Every day their son takes the elevator from the family’s apartment on the 12th floor to the ground floor and goes to school. When he returns in the afternoon, he uses the elevator to get to the fifth floor, and then uses the stairs for the remaining seven floors. Why? Solution: Because he cannot reach the buttons higher than five! Solved by: Marc Sardar, Orna G., Haim Soleimani, Sully K., and Ikey Gadeh. Junior Riddle: Scrambled Letters Submitted by Cynthia A. Re-arrange the letters, O U S W T D N E J R, to spell just one word. What is it? Last Month’s Junior Riddle: Book Smarts What is the longest word in the English dictionary? Solution: ‘Smiles’ – because there is a mile between each “s”! Solved by: Elimelech Heller, Marc Sardar, Michael Levy, The Shmulster, and Ikey Gadeh. Send your solutions! online: go.communitym.com/riddle email: riddles@communitym.com post: 1616 Ocean Pkwy, Brooklyn, NY 11223 Correct solutions received by the 18th of each month will be noted in the next issue. CAN YOU CRACK US UP? Send us your most hilarious jokes, anecdotes, or observations. Top picks will appear in this section with the name of the contributor. email: jokes@communitym.com online: go.communitym.com/jokes post mail: 1616 Ocean Parkway, Brooklyn, NY 11223 The famed city of Chelm, where residents are known for not being so bright, wanted to change their reputation. So, they convened an academic conference. They invited three professors: an engineer, a physicist, and a mathematician for a panel discussion to be moderated by Chaim Yankel, the smartest man in Chelm. Chaim Yankel opened up the session by asking the academics to name the greatest invention of all time. The engineer chose fire, which gave humanity power over matter. The physicist chose the wheel, which gave humanity the power over space. The mathematician chose the alphabet, which gave humanity power over symbols. Chaim Yankel added his two cents and chose the thermos bottle. “Why a thermos bottle?” the others asked. “Because the thermos keeps hot liquids hot in winter and cold liquids cold in summer.” “Yes – so what?” “Think about it,” said Chaim Yankel stroking his beard. “That little bottle – how does it know?!” Norman P. Chelm’s PR Campaign Moishe and Miriam Kaplan moved away from the city to a farm, as that had always been Miriam’s dream. Moishe was having trouble making ends meet on the farm so he would drive around the backroads seeing if any motorists needed help. Sure enough, one day, after being bogged down in a muddy ditch, a motorist paid Moishe fifty dollars to pull him out with his tractor. After he was back on dry ground, he said to Moishe, “At those prices, I bet you’d want to pull people out of muddy ditches day and night.” “I can't," repliedMoishe. “Why not?” asked themotorist. “At night I haul water to the ditch.” Sol T. Ditch ’em Criminology 101 A group of Israeli university students was taking a criminology course when the instructor told the class about a man who was described as a “mystic” who contacted the police who were working on a missing-persons case. “The old man gave eerily detailed instructions on where to find the body,” the teacher said. “In fact, the detectives did find the body just as he had described. Now what would you call that kind of person?” While the rest of the class pondered the question, a police officer taking the course raised his hand and replied, “A suspect.” Victor B.