Community Magazine May 2019

CAN YOU CRACK US UP? Send us your most hilarious jokes, anecdotes, or observations. Top picks will appear in this section with the name of the contributor. e mail: jokes@communitym.com online: go.communitym.com/jokes post mail: 1616 Ocean Parkway, Brooklyn, NY 11223 AGE GUESSER Arnold and Judah, two elderly residents at the Senior Home, are sitting next to each in the lounge. Suddenly, Arnold says to Judah, “I bet you can’t guess how old I am!ˮ “I bet I can,ˮ replies Judah. “Well I'll bet you can't,ˮ says Arnold. “You’re on,ˮ says Judah with a smile. “Now please stand up so that I can properly investigate you.ˮ Arnold does what he's told. Judah then looks him up and down. “Now turn around,ˮ says Judah. Arnold does what he's told and Judah looks him up and down. “Now turn back around and jump up and down on one leg,ˮ says Judah. Arnold does what he's told and Judah looks him up and down. Then he says, “You are 86 years old.ˮ Arnold is absolutely amazed and can't believe what he's just heard. “Wow, Judah,ˮ he says, “you’re absolutely right. I am 86. How on earth did you work that out?ˮ Judah smiles at him and replies, “You told me yesterday!ˮ Carol S. Two brawny men came to Mrs. Applebaum’s house to install some new floor covering in her kitchen. Once they moved the stove and refrigerator out of the way, it was not long before the job was done. As they were getting ready to leave, Mrs. Applebaum asked them to put the heavy appliances back in place. The two men demanded $45 for this service, stating it was not in their contract. Mrs. Applebaum really had no choice but to pay them. As soon as they left, however, the doorbell rang. It was the two men. They asked Mrs. Applebaum to move her car, which was blocking their van. Mrs. Applebaum said, “No problem. My fee is $45.” Cynthia E. MOVE IT! Riddle: Long Line SUBMITTED BY CLAIRE M. You draw a line. Without touching the line, how do you make it a longer line? Last Month’s Riddle: Colorful Homes If a red house is made of red bricks, and a yellow house is made of yellow bricks, what is a greenhouse made of? Solution: Glass! All greenhouses are made of glass. Solved by: Joe Mizrahi, Emily V. Kassab, The Real Buchris, Murad and Sarina Faham, The Family Blum, Ben Torkieh, Ikey and Belle Gadeh, and Joy Gadeh. Junior Riddle: Holy Mystery Item SUBMITTED BY BOBBY K. What is full of holes but still holds water? Last Month’s Junior Riddle: Mystery Word A word I know six letters it contains, remove one letter and twelve remains, what is it? Solution: Dozens! Solved by: Diana Azrak Jr., Haim Soleimani, Chaya Simi Dabbah, Emily V. Kassab, The Family Blum, Deborah Kabasso, Ruthy Mishan, Ben Torkieh, Lavizadeh Family, Ikey and Belle Gadeh, and Joy Gadeh. Send your solutions! online: go.communitym.com/riddle email: riddles@communitym.com post: 1616 Ocean Pkwy, Brooklyn, NY 11223 Correct solutions received by the 18th of each month will be noted in the next issue. 96 COMMUNITY MAGAZINE