Community Magazine March 2019

70 Community Magazine Technology hasmade it way too easy for us to articulate our feelings, especially negative ones, instantaneously and publicly. The result? Lots of careless and toxic exchanges with no filters, a lot of anger, elevated emotions, and resulting heartache. These communications can harmour relationships and cause them to deteriorate and unravel. One of the biggest culprits is texting, followed by email, and posting on social media platforms including Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and WhatsApp. Text bullying, similar to cyberbullying, has become a serious issue with middle school and high school age children and can cause dire consequences. Do you want to improve all your relationships, personal and business? Try counting to 10 before you hit send, tweet, share, or post. Technology is not all bad. As a baby boomer, I consider it almost magical to FaceTime, have zoom video conferences, and shop via cell phones. Doctors can viewmedical test results in real time and perform life-saving surgeries and organ transplants thanks to research, robotics, and technological advances. Who doesn’t enjoy texting her husband or friend to pick up groceries or a prescription, or sharing contact info seamlessly? What concerns me is when texting totally replaces talking to a person on the phone or face to face. Can you really have an authentic dialogue via text? And what does it mean when someone doesn’t respond to your text? And what about email? Our inbox’s have become so cumbersome that we miss the important notices. Studies have revealed the positive and negative impacts of social media. Let’s first highlight the major pros and cons then look at some tools to improve our communication and relationships in today’s high-tech environment. Benefits of Connection, Communication, and Accessibility Hands-down, technology facilitates staying connected with family, friends, colleagues, and childhood classmates. Homebound individuals can reach out and feel less isolated. Social media platforms such as LinkedIn help people find jobs. Non-profit organizations and individuals can raise money for vital causes and new businesses (“crowdsourcing”). Drawbacks However, there are many drawbacks as well. Social media can be a huge time drain and distraction. Howmany times have you seen people eating out at a restaurant glued to their phones? Has someonebumped intoyouon thestreetwhenheor shewas looking at their phone? Thismorning I almost collidedwith someoneas I headed to the subway. Twowomenstopped right in front ofme tocheck their phones. Onewaswalkingherdogandtheotherabruptlypaused. IalsoworrywhenI seenanniesandyoungparentsontheirphoneswhile theyarepushingbaby carriages and crossing the street. According to theDMV, textingwhiledriving is oneof themost dangerous forms of distracted driving. One out of every four car accidents in the U.S. is causedby textingwhile driving. Howoftendo you check your email, texts, andnews feeds on your smart phone? I admit that I do it countless times. I sowelcome shuttingdownmy iPhone andMAC for Shabbat, and so appreciate not hearing those pings for 25hours. The psychological and physiological benefits of unplugging and disconnecting from technology and social media have been well documented. Unplugging can improve our quality of life, helps us sleep better, gives us time to pause and recharge, and allows us to smell roses. Most importantly, it creates the space for us to be aware, mindful, and intentional. Are we spending time on meaningful tasks or activities or are we on automatic? Being attached to one’s phone, computer, or video games also reduces ourtimeoutdoors. Beingoutdoorsimprovesourphysicalandmentalhealth. Miscommunication, Anxiety, and Overload Technology is swift andeffective, but it’s veryeasy tomisunderstand a text or email, and these conduits can hinder communication. We ELLEN GELLER KAMARAS Before You Send Count to Ten