Community Magazine August 2016

SARINA ROFFÉ 54 COMMUNITY MAGAZINE The Top 10 Dedicated in loving memory of Avraham Haim ben Kamar a”h RABBI DANIEL D. LEVY Questions & Answers on customs and laws of Zecher Lehurban – Commemorating The Bet Hamikdash 1 WHAT IS THE SOURCE FROMWHICHWE DERIVE THEOBLIGATIONTODOSPECIAL ACTIONS INMEMORYOF THEBETHAMIKDASH? The Mishnah Berurah ( Orach Haim 560:1) states that during any happy occasion one should do an action zecher lehurban – to remember the destruction of the Bet Hamikdash . The source for this is a pasuk in Tehilimwhich reads: “Im lo a’aleh et Yerushalayimal rosh simhati.” This translates to mean,“if I don’t remember Jerusalem” – specifically the destruction of the Bet Hamikdash – “at the time of my happiness.” The Shulhan Aruch cites (560:2) the beginning of the pasuk : “If I forget Yershalayim , my right hand will be forgotten.” 2 WHAT IS THE SPECIFIC SIGNIFICANCE OF BREAKING A GLASS CUP UNDER THE HUPPAH (CANOPY) DURING AWEDDING? Although there are a minority of people who use an earthenware cup under the huppah , the prevailing custom is to use glass. Tosafot in Berachot 31a cites the story of Mar, the son of Ravina, as the source for this practice. (See Answer 6 below for more elaboration). Glass is transparent; one can see its essence, with nothing to hide. So, too, a Jew should be transparent and honest without allowing the yetzer hara to inject impurity in him. ( Moed Kol Hai, Siman 10:96). As the breaking of the glass is done to commemorate the destruction of the Bet Hamikdash , a complete cup at full value should be used for the ritual, not one that is broken or cheaply made. It is appropriate to recite the verse “Im eshkachech Yerushalayim…” right before breaking the glass, in order to remember the Bet Hamikdash at the time of this happy occasion. 3 IN ONE’S HOME, WHERE IS THE APPROPRIATE PLACE TO PUT AN AMAH AL AMAH ZECHER LEHURBAN ? An Amah Al Amah is approximately 18 inches by 18 inches of unpainted wall in the shape of a square. Zecher lehurban , the cement should remain without plaster and be in direct view of the front entrance of the house ( Shulhan Aruch Orach Haim 560:1). If, upon entering one’s home, there is no wall directly ahead, then it is advisable to leave the Amah Al Amah either to the side, near the entrance, or as the first possible spot in visible view upon entering ( Pri Megadim, Or Letzion ). The Kaf Hachaim explains (560:7) that the Amah Al Amah should remind a person of the destruction of the Bet Hamikdash and cause him to feel grief so that he mourns over its absence. 4 IS IT CUSTOMARY TO PUT ASHES ON THE HEAD OF THE GROOM AT HISWEDDING? Hacham Ovadiah explains (Hazon Ovadiah, pg. 432) that the prevailing Sephardic custom is not to put ashes on the groom’s head at his wedding. Some commentators (Shulhan Gavoah 560:5) explain that the breaking of the glass under the huppah is enough of a reminder of the Bet Hamikdash at the joyous occasion. However, most Ashkenazic Jews follow the Ramah (ibid 560:2) and do practice the custom of putting ashes on the groom’s head. 5 IF ONE PURCHASES A HOUSE THAT DID NOT ALREADY HAVE AN AMAH BY AMAH ZECHER LEHURBAN IS HE OBLIGATED TOMAKE ONE? The Shulhan Aruch (O.C. 560:1) states that one who purchases an already built house that does not have an Amah Al Amah , is already considered established and is not required to peel the paint from the walls. The Mishnah Berurah (ibid) qualifies that this is only the case if the house was purchased from a non-Jew. However, if the owner was Jewish and sold it without an Amah Al Amah , the person who purchased it would be obligated to make one. Practically speaking, regardless of who the house was purchased from, most halachic authorities require putting an Amah Al Amah in the house. If the house is being repainted, the Amah al Amah should be done at that time. If making an Amah Al Amah will cause shalom bayit (marital harmony) problems, it is permissible to just paint that area a different color instead of not using plaster. 6 HOW IS ONE TO APPLY TO DAILY LIFE THE PRECEPT OF THE SHULHAN ARUCH (560:5) THAT STATES “ONE SHOULD NOT FILL THEIR MOUTHWITH LAUGHTER IN THISWORLD”? It is perfectly fine for one to crack a joke and have a sense of humor. In fact, prestigious Rabbis often began their classes with humor to draw the attention of their students. Still, it is forbidden for one to cross the line and become light headed as a result of filling his mouth with excessive laughter (even at a wedding). In fact the Gemara ( Berachot 31a) brings down the story of Mar, the son of Ravina, who took a glass cup worth 400 zuz and broke it to tone down the lightheaded atmosphere that began to develop at his son’s wedding. (According to Tosafot, this is actually where we derive the custom to break a glass cup at a wedding.)