Community Magazine January 2014

The berachah, “be’Gan Eden mikedem – in the Garden of Eden long ago” recited under the huppah takes on a whole new meaning when the wedding is held in a utopian, paradisal backdrop of light blue skies, lush palm trees, white sand and turquoise tinged water. W edding debates in the community are no longer concerning food (rib steak or filet mignon), flowers (tulips or white roses) or music (orchestra or DJ), but on hosting a wedding in the Caribbean or Europe. Destination weddings have become a very real option for many community members, who find themselves wondering about the viability of such affairs. This month we present the pros and cons of the destination wedding option, and why it may suit the particular needs of our community. A Wedding Without the Dentist Turks and Caicos, Aruba, Acapulco. These Caribbean isles have recently become the luxurious settings of choice destination weddings for many community families. What precisely is a destination wedding, and why the present-day hype and mounting popularity? Millie Marcus, co-founder of ETC, a wedding planner company specializing in destinationweddings, explains that a destinationwedding is a wedding in an exotic locale far from home that can take place practically anywhere in the world. “They can be as large or small as the bride and groom desire,” Millie says. “Some couples prefer to celebrate with family and select friends, while others choose to invite as many guests as they would to a traditional wedding at home.” Destination weddings have been found to be a perfect alternative for couples who want to avoid the stress, big budgets, and anxiety of the myriad technicalities that most traditional weddings entail. Millie notes that “couples with small families and second marriages opt for destination weddings, as well as those that are okay getting married without their dentist in attendance.” Here are the fundamentals of a destination wedding so that you can decide if going someplace else is exactly where you want to marry! Budget Basics If done correctly, a destination wedding can cost no more, and probably even less, than hosting the same party at one of the many halls in Brooklyn or Deal. Imagine – your wedding in Mexico will likely be less expensive than having it a couple of blocks away from your house, even when you factor in airfare, hotel expenses and planning trips! Of course, there are several extra expenses you’ll need to consider for any destination wedding, including importing key vendors and decor, an on-hand mashgiah , welcome bags for guests, additional activities and travel costs for you and your immediate families, and the planning of trips. Let’s face it, the cost of a traditional ceremony and reception at any one of our beautiful banquet halls can be staggering – and it lasts only a few hours. Planning a destination wedding can cost considerably less, often includes more, is fully customizable and is affordable for every budget. Before searching for the perfect destination, be mindful of your budget and be realistic. Don’t be upset if some of your closest friends or relatives can’t attend. While you are, in a sense, footing some of the food bills, their fees for travel, hotel, and car rental can really add up. If you are able to pay any portion of your guests’way, it is a thoughtful and very much appreciated gesture. Usually, couples take this course of action when there aren’t many affordable lodging options near their site. In general, though, it is not required that you cover any of your guests’expenses, but aim for harmony regardless and choose a location that offers accommodation options in all price points. You know your guests best, so keep in mind what you think they’ll be willing and able to spend when you select your wedding’s location. Possibility or Impracticality? Destination Weddings: A.D. COHEN 60 COMMUNITY MAGAZINE