Community Magazine December 2013

24 COMMUNITY MAGAZINE – to move on and bury the hostility deep in the past, where it belongs. No relationship – among family members, neighbors, associates, or community members – will ever be perfect. If the righteous sons of Yaakov Avinu, founders of the twelve tribes of Israel, could find themselves embroiled in tension and acrimony, then we are certainly vulnerable to mistakes, and all the more so. And the key is to not only endeavor to avoid such mistakes, but also move on after mistakes were made, which requires the courage of both parties to admit wrongdoing and forgive wrongdoing. Too often, the cause of broken relationships is not an offense committed, but the parties’ inability to move on after an offense is committed. Strained relationships can be repaired, as long as those three magic words are said sincerely: “I was wrong,” and “I forgive you.” Our Patriarch’s Parting Message The Torah records the famous blessings that Yaakov Avinu bestowed upon his sons before his death. Immediately after the blessings, the Torah writes, “All these are the twelve tribes of Israel, and this is what their father spoke to them and blessed them – he gave each his appropriate blessing” (49:28). This entire verse seems, at first glance, redundant, introducing no information of which we were not yet aware. The explanation, I believe, is that the Torah is telling us what Yaakov said to his sons after giving each his own personal blessing: “All these are the twelve tribes of Israel.” He was telling them that although each tribe received an individual blessing in accordance with its individual strengths and talents, they all are and must always be “the tribes of Israel,” united under the single banner of Am Yisrael . As long as they all strive to serve their Creator following the spiritual legacy of Avraham, Yitzchak and Yaakov, they must remain together and united despite their differences. There are many messages that Yaakov, the final of the three patriarchs, could have chosen as his parting words before his passing. But he pointed specifically to this message of ahdut , of unity among his children. He saw how strife and discord drove the family into exile, and realized that unity and mutual respect would rescue them from exile. And thus from among all the many values and obligations that Judaism encompasses, he decided to focus on ahavat Yisrael as his parting message. There will always been differences of opinion and differences in approach separating us, and there will, invariably, be mistakes made. But we must remember that we are all surrounded by the same “wall,” we are, at the end of the day, the descendants of Avraham, Yitzchak and Yaakov trying to serve Gd. Let us heed our patriarch’s parting words and learn to respect all “twelve tribes.” It is easy to get along with people who think and act exactly like us, and with those who never do anything wrong, but if those are the only ones we get along with, we will find ourselves very lonely. We must learn to love, care for and respect even those with whom we disagree, and even those with whom we have a history of grievance. Let us remove the walls that separate us so we may be granted the privilege to assemble together within the walls of Jerusalem, serving Gd together, in love, peace and unity, speedily and in our days, amen .