Community Magazine April 2012

MATERNAL PRIDE Three mothers are sitting on an Ocean Parkway bench talking about how much their sons love them. Ruth says, “You know the Chagall painting hanging in my living room? My son, Abe, bought that for me for my 53rd– uh– 26th birthday. He’s a good son and loves me dearly.” Esther says, “You call that love? You know the Range Rover I just got for Mother’s Day? That’s from my son Benny. What a doll!” Arlene says, “That’s nothing. You know my son Stanley? He’s in session with a psychoanalyst in Manhattan for about 15 years now. Five sessions a week, and each one costs him $250. And what do you think he talks about at each one? Me!” Abhu Cohen LOOK ALIKES As a mother of nine, it’s no easy job for Sandra to get her family dressed each morning – let alone getting them all to wear outfits that are matching. But somehow, day in and day out, she manages to dress them all in matching clothes, down to the little baby. When asked why she makes the extra effort to match their outfits, she explained, “When we had just four children, I started dressing them alike so we wouldn’t lose any of them… Now, I dress them alike so we don’t accidentally pick up any that don’t belong to us.” Ralph Esses A RUSH HOUR ADVENTURE Jones came into the office an hour late for the third time in one week and found the boss waiting for him. “What’s the story this time, Jones?” he asked sarcastically. “Let’s hear a good excuse for a change.” Jones sighed, “Everything went wrong this morning, boss. The wife decided to drive me to the station. She got ready in ten minutes, but then the drawbridge got stuck. Rather than let you down, I swam across the river, ran out to the airport, chartered a helicopter, landed on the roof of Madison Square Garden, and was carried here piggyback by Jeremy Lin of the New York Knicks.” “Come on Jones,” said the boss, obviously disappointed. “You’ll have to do better than that… everyone knows that no woman can get ready in ten minutes.” Y. D. RECOGNIZING THE HIGHER POWER A teacher said to her students, “We have been learning how powerful kings and queens were in ancient times. But, there is a higher power. Can anybody tell me what it is?” Nathan raised his hand. “Yes, Nathan,” the teacher encouraged, “what is the higher power?” Smiling confidently, Nathan replied, “Aces!” Shlomo Schweky Riddle: The Time for Wine SUBMITTED BY: Isaac Sutton Sharon forgot to buy wine for Passover. Her neighbor Esther has extra wine in a 7 pint container that is full to the top, but needs 3 pints for herself. Sharon has empty 4 and 3 pint containers, but needs exactly two pints for each of the two seders. Pouring the few- est times, how can the 7 pints or wine be split into quantities of 2, 2 and 3 pints? Last Month’s Riddle: Business Ethics Mr. Grazi is making a sales pitch in a faraway city, where there are two types of people, Emets, who always speak the truth and Shekers who always lie. After the pitch, he asked the buyer how many units he wanted to purchase and the buyer wrote 1,000,000. Amazed by this, he asked the buyer to confirm if he would really buy that many, but the answer was in a language he didn’t understand. So Mr. Grazi asked the secretary what the buyer said and she answered, “The buyer said no,” and added, “He won’t pay for the order.” Did Mr. Grazi get the order? Solution: Mr. Grazi got the order for 1,000,000 units. The buyer must have said: “Yes,” no matter whether he is an Emet or a Sheker. Since the secretary said “The buyer said no,” she must be a Sheker and anything she says is not true. Therefore, her additional statement that the buyer “Won’t pay for the order,” must also be a lie. Solved by: Ezra Sitt, Ezra Sasson, Alan Mograby, Victor Grazi Junior Riddle: Matzah Balls SUBMITTED BY: Joey Harari There were three whole matzah balls left in a pot of soup. David took one whole, Yosef took another whole and Shlomo took another whole. But there was still one whole matzah ball left in the pot. How is it possible? Last Month’s Junior Riddle: Moving Day Rosalyn is moving to a new house. She has a pet dog, cat, and mouse. The animals do not get along in the car and must be brought to the new house one at a time. However, she can’t leave the dog alone with the cat, because the dog chases the cat if no one is watching. And she can’t leave the cat and the mouse together, because...well, you know what would happen if they did. How can Rosalyn transfer all three pets to their new house? Solution: First she takes the cat to the new house, leaving the dog and the mouse at the old house. Returning to the old house, she then takes the mouse to the new house. She takes the cat back to the old house, leaves it there, and takes the dog to the new house. Then she returns to the old house for the cat. Solved by: Albert Beda Trivia: 36: Percent of Israeli Jews who say they make sure to hear the reading of Megilat (the Book of) Esther on Purim. 67: Percent of Israeli Jews who say they abandon hamess (leavened foods) during the week long Passover holiday. (Source: 2009 survey by the Avi Chai Foundation survey) ! SEND YOUR SOLUTIONS! mobile: Scan the QR code at right online: go.CommunityM.com/riddle email: riddles@Community M .com facsimile: 718-504-4246 postal mail: 1616 Ocean Parkway, Brooklyn, NY 11223 Correct solutions received by the 20 th of each month will be noted in the next issue. 104 COMMUNITY MAGAZINE