Community Magazine September 2009

12 COMMUNITY MAGAZINE COMMUNITY SCHOOL CHOICE Your beautifully designed August cover, featuring the fine-looking inaugural class of Yeshivat Magen Abraham, brought a tear to my eye as I contemplated the greatness of our community. I recall when no more than four or five years ago Community Magazine ran a starkly different cover with a picture of a high school candidate marked “rejected.” At the time, our community was facing a difficult crisis as our yeshiva high schools were filled beyond capacity forcing them to turn away a sizable number of our children. Today, mushalah, in addition to Magen Abraham, our community boasts two other fast-emerging boys’ high schools: Rabbi Semah’s Maor Yeshiva and Rabbi Marcus’ Or HaTorah. Tizke lemissvot to these rabbis and their supporters who responded so effectively to the community’s need. R. Sultan MARVELOUS MENTAL MEDICATION The ongoing series, Mental Health Notes, has elicited a number of letters. Among them was Dr. Robert Hedaya’s comments about the overuse of medication in treating mental health disorders. Though clearly Dr. Hedaya did not reject medication as treatment for mental illness, some readers may have gotten the wrong impression about their importance. I suffer from bipolar disorder and I thank Gd everyday from the wisdom He gave to the scientists at pharmaceutical companies who discovered these medications. As it is, there is enough stigma associated with mental disorders, people should not feel that there is something wrong with taking medication. Many mental disorders are chronic and do not have a cure. We would never discourage a cancer patient from using chemotherapy because it may not be 100 percent effective and because it was created by scientists. Similarly, it would be foolish for people to misread the letter of a psycho pharmacologist (one who studies how drugs affect mental and behavioral functions), to believe that we should altogether avoid medications formulated for mental health disorders. ANOTHER SINGLES SOLUTION In the August 2009 issue of Community Magazine, a girl asked Sito what she can do for herself, as she is growing bitter about not getting married after a number of years. Although much of the advice given was helpful, I believe an important point was left out. As an experienced matchmaker who was born in, and has been living among the community, I cannot stress enough how crucial it is for girls of marriageable age to look their best and maintain a healthy weight. Vain and unfortunate as it may be, this is the reality that we must face. Experience has shown that it is far more difficult to set up overweight girls. While we can’t change the psychological and cultural forces that make the boys this way, the good news is that girls might be able to overcome this obstacle by changing what is within their control. When in public, a single girl who wishes to get married should always try to wear make- up, have her hair done, wear nice clothes and look as good as she can. This applies across the spectrums of age and religious level.Mind you, this advice is coming from a woman who is not at all concerned with appearances generally. I am usually a mess unless going to an event, and I don’t typically have the time or inclination to dress fancy. But I am married with five children, so although it may not be ideal, it is not hurting my chances of finding a mate. As a matchmaker, I usually cannot say this to the girls or their parents for fear of hurting feelings, but every girl needs to recognize and face this harsh reality so that they can address this issue and, beezrat Hashem, get married sooner rather than later. A. N. RECIPES HIT THE SPOT I just wanted to say thank you for the Recipe Section each month. The recipes are so good and I look forward to them every month! As a newlywed, I am always trying to come up with new ideas and this section is really helpful! R. Weitz CORRECTION: The score of the 2009 Hatzalah / NYPD Softball game was incorrectly stated in the previous issue. The correct score was NYPD 6 Hatzalah 1. L E T T E R S WE'D LOVE TO HEAR FROMYOU! WRITE US A LETTER Letters submitted become the property of Community Magazine and will not be returned unless accompanied by a self- addressed stamped envelope. Letters may be edited and revised for length, style and grammar before publication. All submissions are considered for publication unless otherwise requested. Preferential consideration is given to brief comments and insights that relate directly to published content. MAIL: COMMUNITYMAGAZINE 1616 OCEAN PKWY BROOKLYN, NY 11223 FAX: 718-504-4246 EMAIL: letters@community m .com VolumeVIIINo.11 Av5769 August2009 COMM UNITY AnElite,Business- FocusedEducation... ...AnUncompromising SpiritualFoundation? O R sed CarefulWhatYouBelieve RabbiEliMansour HalfOffYeshiva Tuition? Kelly JemalMassry AWoman’sMission:MyRealization PoopaDweck Rabbi Yosef Churba with the students of Yeshivat MagenAbraham CanOne School Really do BOTH?